Tuesday, May 24, 2011

RIP "Macho Man" Randy Savage

The Macho Man died a few days ago. He kicked ass... what more do you want me to say?

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Bigger than the brand.

When is a personality bigger than the brand?
Take Jobs out of Apple is Apple the same?
Take the Bogusky out of CP+B is CP+B the same?
Rip Salsa thinks not. If the Snarky Agencyspy website is correct and another layoff wave is headed towards the CP+B offices you have to wonder what the absence of Alex has done to the brander of brands. Once high on Acid and some really cheap gin I sat in on a Q&A with Alex in San Diego and I have to say the guy was a dynamic personality and he had an effect on others around him to be creative. Was the writing on the wall? You saw an Noah-like flood of talent leaving even before the Alex left (See Evan Fry and his cool little start up) and current talent just doesn't have that "It" quality to keep the cool going at the high octane speed needed. Can you say Polaroid?

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Biggie Smalls Son is an actor

Didn't recongize the resemblance until I saw an article on indiewire.He stars in that LIONSGATE movie Everything Must Go opposite Will Farrell. I hope the kid does well, I love Biggie and all things big.

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Erik Ainge Thinks He Did More Drugs Than Charlie Sheen… and He’s Mormon

Erik Ainge admits to being a drug addict in this article, actually he brags about it. He says, “I would’ve made Charlie Sheen look like Miss Daisy.” Sounds like he’s still on drugs… actually he is, keep reading because here are a few points Erik needs to consider before he opens his mouth again.

First, Sheen made $1.8 million per episode, you signed a four-year $1.87 million deal to play for the NY Jets and your football career is over. Sheen lives in Malibu and is insane, you lived in New Jersey… in an apartment, which is also insane. Let’s do the math… $1.8 million for one episode of that shitty sitcom, or $1.8 million for 4 years of playing football, oh and your football contract isn’t guaranteed.

Second, you have tattoos reminding you not to do drugs. Seriously? You can’t just look at a line of coke say “eh, I can’t handle this shit”? Instead you have to have tats that say, “One Day At A Time” and “This Too Shall Pass”. Erik, you’re either an idiot (he is Mormon, so…) or you’re a dipshit. I’d say you’re both. But hey, at least he gets to have multiple wives! I wonder if old Joseph Smith is punishing Erik for going to Tennessee instead of BYU? Probably, I mean Joe Smith was a prophet and all.

Third. Erik, you have a fat, puffy face and you’re not even 25, which only means you’re either drinking a shitload of alcohol or you’re on med’s… oh, that’s right, you are on meds. You’re on “bipolar medication”. Well, at least you have an excuse of why you’re a drug addict. I mean, hell, it’s not your fault you wasted your talent, it’s the “rapid cycling bipolar disorder.” Right? Good thing there’s more drugs to cure you, or at least keep you stable for the rest of your life. Hurray for prescription drugs!

The good news is since your football career is over I know he can get a job as a car salesman.

Saturday, May 7, 2011

I Love You Mom

Mother gets to go to Sizzler on me tonight!

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Thor – Everybody Wants A Piece of the Action

I used to know a guy who was in great shape, actually he was in too good of shape. He worked out five hours a day on top of working a meager job sweeping out warehouses filled with soda. He made very little money and whenever he’d encounter anyone of wealth he would say this, “If you don’t have your health, you don’t have anything.” What he was really saying was, “I better live longer than all those rich bastards.”

Well, that guy died a long time ago but still works out five hours a day. Weird, huh.

Oh, and speaking of muscles… here’s the THOR trailer they didn’t show you.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Fake pictures of Osama's penis now on the internet.

More instant than oatmeal. The internet is awesome!
The kooks came out and swore that Osama wasn't dead, was dead for six years, still in hiding or some other theory that makes you sound the the biggest fucking basement-liver ever. Fake pictures abound proves they are right and the United States and the CIA are wrong.
The real picture that is circulating now is his enormous crank that he walked around with. No wonder he had a few wives.
After that go tell people how getting a vaccine against measles makes your sperm count go down.