Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Vitamin K is one of the Drugs Car Salesmen Do

MALACCA Car salesmen love Vitamin K


PAC 10 Wins again

The Sun Bowl was a 2 o'clock last call hookup type of a win but the Oregon State Beavers make it 4-0 in bowl games this year.
Pac-10 v. ACC WIN
Pac-10 v. Big 12 WIN
Pac-10 v. Big East WIN
Pac-10 v. MWC WIN

Too bad USC didn't get to play the Florida for the Championship but the BCS said no.

Happy New Year: TOP LISTS OF 2008

Whateverdrugscarsalesmendo [WDCSD] loves a good list almost as much as we hate serial killing clowns.
Some predictions from Contentinople on what may happen with Digital Hollywood and how some of the revenue streams will work.
WDCSD has compiled the top lists of 2008 with the Maxium contributing the most lists as we all know Maxium is a list generating son-of-a-bitch.

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Pac-10 Soft? 3-0 in bowl games (so far) and a big slap in the face for the the Big 12

Once again the Pac-10 kicks ass when it matters.
The Big 12 is the Cobra Kai karate dojo and the Pac-10 is Danny.

Obama uses video for reason why we don't need guns

Obama loves this one!

There really is no need for the 2nd amendment when we have pressure washing vigilantes.

Does anyone hear Death Wish VII???

Groundbreaking Study: Teens Lie and Have Sex

I hate studies, but I do read the ones that affirm my pathetic existence.

Gist - if your teen pledges to
not have sex, start buying diapers. Palin style. The UK laugh at us and blame the Jonas Bros. But don't worry kids, it's cool to be pregnant. Oh, and it's all Juno's fault.

You know what I hate worse than studies, teens that don't have sex and wear rings. On the other hand, $23.95 isn't a bad way to purify your soul.

Adam Sandler is the New Eddie Murphy

The Sandler lifestyle is costly and with so many recent flops under his belt Mr. Adam Sandler sells remaining star power for kiddy movies and kissing Kurt Russell's ass. No star wants to burn every bridge, take up boxing, move to Europe and come full circle in a badass wrestling movie but some hold onto a thread of decency and self worth.
Say hello to Will at SOLDOUT ESTATES. Sandler is kicking ass with holiday blockbusters, his production company busting out HOUSE BUNNY and Whateverdrugscarsalesmendo are working out of a refurbished former Motel 6 off Los Feliz and Hillhurst. Famehole.

Police Blotter from Athens lets you know how the South Parties.

WDCSD would enjoy that sentence alone but the fantastic part is the description of the incident.

Officers found the 43-year-old man outside of Fred's, 2656 Atlanta Highway, reeking of mouthwash and covered with poison ivy rash, according to police.

Party on Georgia and keep saying "Thank God for Alabama"

Monday, December 29, 2008

Oregon, the new Florida?

Oregon, home of hippies, loggers and pregnant men.

Now the hippies, loggers and pregnant men of Oregon think it's a good idea to track your every move, then tax you on it.

Fucking Oregon. I thought hippies and loggers liked their privacy. Guess not. Hey Oregon, say hello to Florida and Texas when you reach the bottom of shit hill.

MONSANTO listed as FOOD company in Businessweek

Monsanto a food company? names Monsanto one of the 'Worlds most influential companies'(Can't you just hear that big head Keith Olbermann saying that?) the statement may be correct, but they list Monsanto as a FOOD company?
Food Company? WTH? (Child friendly What the Fuck)
And the makers of
Agent Orange would be listed as 'Harvest Agent'

Alex Bogusky takes time off from killing the idea of Clean Coal

Staffers at Whateverdrugscarsalesmendo [WDCSD] received a box of thumbtacks and a churro for Christmas and they were all happy until WDCSD staffers heard what CP+B got in their stockings.
Alex encourages future employees to sing and strum qualifications during job interviews.
WDCSD found that the most informative part of the video is Alex saying

"I'm not one to dictate everything."

Works for me.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

You can't polish a turd...but Jerry Jones tries.

You Can't Polish a Turd unless your a Cowboy.
Jerry Jones?
Bum Phillip's Kid or Bill Parcells? NICE CALL !!!!

McDonald's PR Chief spins killing

McDonald's corporation PR chief Tara Lazarus Hayes claims that McDonald's was thankful that this didn't happen on Christmas.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

What the hell?

Oh wait it was from Rush? It wasn't his fault? He wasn't caught with viagra and a air pump crossing the mexican boarder?

Have some pills Rushbo.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

SPAM and the tradition we love

Whatever Drugs Car Salesmen Do [WDCSD] have SPAM in the commissary and hours of conversation have been dedicated to the gelatinous meat.
WDCSD always spend time in Maui over the Holidays and after watching Rip eat his meal I rushed back to the room at the Maui Inn and found this gem from BK.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008





The woman in the Marley & Me II movie trailer claims Stephen Colbert's dog bit her in the pants. María Conchita Alonso stars in the sequel to the highly successful Marley and Me. The pairing of María and Stephen seemed an odd match but Quentin Jerome Tarantino's first comedy feature promises to do for Stephen and María what Pulp Fiction did for John Travolta and what Jackie Brown did for Robert Forster. The stars of Marley & Me, Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston, declined the contract option to be in the sequel due to scheduling conflicts. Insiders claim Owen thinks Quentin is a "D-bag" and Jennifer is writing her biography called Me and my giant chin.
We here at Whatever Drugs Car Salesmen Do [WDCSD] think the potential for this gem is enormous.
It works for me

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Typical Weekend

I took my Lamborghini out this weekend, jumped a few draw bridges .. again.

EVERYBODY LOVES A LIST: The Cheating Spouse's Cheat Sheet: 36 things every guy should know before he cheats.

Rip found this list to be a good one.

36 seems like a lot of reading for a booty call.
Here at Whatever Drugs Car Salesmen Do [WDCSD] we have two lists.
The first list contains only one suggestion. DON'T 'Cause the bitches are crazy.
The second list contains only two suggestions. The 100 mile rule and the Rubber and Club Her.
The 100 mile rule is simple never cheat close to home. The Rubber and Club Her are for NFL players

and Criminals and WDCSD doesn't agree or condone the use. came up with the 36 things you should know before cheating on your woman.
All good ideas but the best thing WDCSD found in the article was the women's watchdog and suggestion web site

We love a good list.

The Big Fight!

Is one of those guys Brock Lesnar? No, oh, then who gives a shit.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Cowboy's Defense

This is a picture of the Cowboy D, minus the fence.

Those guys rushed for 45 yards each.

Sweating to the McNugget

Keith Sweat opening act at your local county fair.

This dude just took the 'Dip' into the world of SOLD.

In Today's Economy

Punch anyone who says this phrase. That's right, punch them .. Your friends will thank you, strangers will shake your hand, kids will laugh and the person you punched will send you a hand written thank you letter four weeks from the date your fist bashed their nose.

That said ...

In Today’s Economy - You must be ready. Ready for what? Everything, and these SIX FILMS will help.

1. Red Dawn – if you can’t avenge Harry Dean Stanton you’re fucked.

2. Apocalypse Now - so that’s how Frank Booth became Frank Booth. Makes sense.

3. Road Warrior - hold on to your assless chaps! This is from Mad Max, so what.

4. Six String Samurai - remember when you dropped out of college to play lead guitar in that band that peaked by playing a shitty gig on the worst talk show in the history of television – The Carson Daily Show. Then everyone you knew laughed at you. Well, fuck them. You’re now the leader of the world and you rock.

5. Children of Men – Michael Caine growing and smoking massive amounts of dope in a cool cabin in the middle of nowhere. Sounds like my Uncle Ramón.

6. WALL-E - keep your 64-ounce 7-Eleven soda mug and you’ll be fine. If you're hard core, and you know you are, make it a double gulp, those are the best. Basically be an American - who says fat and lazy won't pay off.

Two questions being asked around Hollywood Circles IS IT GOING TO SNOW IN ASPEN? and IS J-LO GETTING SEPERATED?

The buzz is J-lo is getting a divorce from Singer Marc Anthony.
Buzz? My yellow lab is hungry this morning? Is that a buzz? The sky holds rain clouds? Is that a buzz? Driving a school bus is just more fun drunk?
According to Randy McMullen of the Contra Costa Times it's true.


People for Ethical Treatment of Animals Peta released it's 2008 movie ratings with ratings of Good, Bad and in-between using two paws up for good, hisses and growls for bad, and site no silly animal reference for the in-between movies so I just use scratching at the door to poo as the animal reference for the in between.
The article quotes Peta director Jason Baker. "One must understand that movies don't just entertain, they have the power to educate and inspire, and they can even influence viewers' behavior." WTF? I watched "The Wrestler" last week and so far I didn't fore go visiting my daughter and instead fucked a coked up bar slut in the women's bathroom, not yet at least.

Top honors go to
"Marley & Me" starring a rescued yellow lab, Friends "actress" Jennifer Aniston, and a rescued Owen Wilson. This gets two paws up. The movie gives you the good feeling that dogs are family members no matter what.

I guess Peta is referring to 'good' families. I was left on the side of the road returning from the dump after trying to change the radio button in on my fathers car stereo, I could only imagine what he would of done if I took a shit on the carpet. Would Peta be happy if I did meth with my dog?

Peta praise "Bolt"
movie about a canine 'actor' who accidentally gets lost and discovers the joys of simply being a dog. I don't want to have to describe this bit of Hollywood genius. It stars John Travola and Billy Ray Cyrus's daughter (Where the hell is Butch Coolidge when you need him)

The final top honor goes to "The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian." all the animals are CGI so no animals were harmed in the realistic battles of flying mammals versus snakes in armored battle gear. What Peta fails to realize is the well known fact that CGI technicians, as a field, have the highest addiction to man on animal porn based on traffic to these sites.

As far as the movies that are feeling the wrath of Peta
"Semi-Pro" starring Will Farrell
according to the article it features Rocky, a grizzly bear from Predators in Action which provides animals and handlers for Hollywood movies. "These violations include failing to maintain structures and shelters in good repair, keeping a lion in a tiny shelter box in the snow, and failing to provide animals with drinking water," Peta says. "After the movie was released, Rocky fatally mauled one of his trainers."
So what's the problem? I thought Peta loved a good mauling.


"You Don't Mess with the Zohan" encourages deadly copycat actions. In one scene, Zohan uses a cat as a hacky sack (a small bag filled with beans and used in a game that requires juggling it in the air with the feet), and in another scene, a man uses a cow as a punching bag.
I saw copycat hacksacking throughout Los Angeles last week.
Prince Caspian Trailer

Bolt Trailer

Semi-Pro Trailer

Marley & Me trailer

Friday, December 19, 2008

The Stiffy Award of the week

Sometimes an image or a set of words put together have power, power to get you off the ass sculpture your building on your sofa cushion.

My Stiffy award goes to.

Marketing McDonalds new DRIVE OVER THEN DRIVE THROUGH will be a tough sell

McDonald's offered a free espresso to the first customer to run over another human and drag him through the drive through. Crazy Idea but it works for me. .wytv

It was no surprise that the McDonald's Corporation will stop at nothing to market it's product. From the hiring of Larry Light, former executive vice-president for marketing and media services at BBDO Worldwide to the rebranding of Ronald McDonald to stupid ass videos that claim the goodness and wholeness of McDonalds. Larry and Mary love a fight and when your opponent is the Huffington Post or employees who want to Unionize...You'll win.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Crispin Porter + Bogusky land Best Buy

CP+B will get to sprinkle
Best Buy with it's magic in 2009.
Their first idea was to come up with a spray colongne that smelled like the managers chair but Alex quashed that idea for the hidden camera hidden in a camera in the camera section idea, none dared to disagree.
Best Buy works for me and CP+B. Best Buy employees can't afford to buy jeans anywhere else than Old Navy and most employees have that "I just ate at Burger King" look.