Lindsay Lohan and Rip Salsa enjoy each other

Lindsay is awesome!

Finally they leave you alone for doing something legal.

The only difference was I was driving a school bus.

When you try having a blog that has some consistency you need to stay at home and never leave! Bloggers who stay at home never get in trouble... If you have a neck tatoo, drive a school bus and have spent time at Walla-Walla they pick on you.

CP+B wins our daily Google Alert contest

They are the master of self promotion.

CP+B have five Google Alerts by noon.

1. NY TIMES

2. Brand-e.biz

3. AD WEEK (Nice Subaru Beard Conrad)

4. crain's new york business

5. Creativity

6. WDCSD

Woman falls off shitter at McDonald's and you'll never guess who is getting sued

This time it isn't boiling coffee scalding your nuts, McDonald's made you fat, Grease Tax, Finger in the fries or anything regarding your food. It was the shitter that got McDonald's sued. Some fat ass broad, Cherry Hardie, (Just guessing she is fat as a house because it's the fat broads that bust my toilet) fell off the toilet seat in a Chicago area McDonald's reaching for paper. She hurt her arm and shoulder and is claiming she is disabled because of the ordeal. Words used by her obviously fat lawyer were "Severe shock to her nervous system" and "$30,000" pay it and waddle away.

'Cause it is all about the delicious choices.

Top 10 Tasered Moments

Not 10 but I got 6.

Philly Fan

The Don't Tase me Bro.

Drunk A's Fan "Come on! Take it easy on him"

Eric Estrada's testicle blast

Or your getting it again

Cop can not wait to taser fat black guy

Step Two: Kill the parents

Fucking dip shits with exotic pets.

What the fuck are you proving by owning a snake that takes up more room than an Andre the Giant shit?  Were all the pit bulls taken?  Did the local Tiger adoption fall through?  Life has enough bullshit without introducing a snake.

ARTICLE

LIVING NEAR KFC DOESN'T MAKE YOU FAT

At WDCSD we love a good study.
The study from Indiana University-Purdue University Indanapolis (Handful)
points out that living next to a BK or Skippers does not make you fat. The study also mentions living next to a shopping mart full of fresh fruits and vegetables does not make you skinny.
The cool thing was living next to a kickball diamond or some sort of recreational facility made you skinnier. Living next to a track and field facility made you fatter according to the study.
Kicking a ball or running around tackling a buddy is fun, running in circles in front of your parents and those creepy track dudes...NOT FUN. Once again loser scientists spent a shitload of money to prove that sitting on your ass makes you fat and track is boring. Way to go science dudes.

ARTICLE

The F-word in a McDonald's Happy Meal CD

McDonald's Happy Meal Song has the Gavin Degraw remake with the F-bomb in it....Interesting  

LISTEN HERE 

and you decide

60 Foot Weenie... Really

Apparently in Europe a 'phallus' is a giant drawing of a dick.

I wonder how much Ron charged them to pose?

When You Kill Someone with Your Car-Leave a Note that says "I'm Sorry"

Only in America.

Someone plows over a dude walking along the road and then pins a "I'm sorry I hit you but because I have a family and I don't want to stick around and take blame" note on the dead body. Maybe Drew Barrymore was in town, Halle Berry touring the countryside, Brandy?, Matthew Broderick or maybe it was Laura Bush's ex lover?

There is no truth that he was part of the new Burger King campaign of Sacrificing a friend and get a Whopper, as that was regarding Facebook and not human carnage. We may update this story if the note left at scene involves the sentence "Free Whopper".

ARTICLE

NO WAY! Heart Attack Victim Saved by Defibrillator Salesman After Car Crash

This is too good to be true.

What are the chances the car you almost hit after having a heart attack was being driven by a Defibrillator salesmen?

What's next?

Condom Salemen saves whore from beating?

Southern United States Denny's owner saves black man from burning building?

Dick Cheney saves choking vegan?

ARTICLE

Hell is coming for Breakfast...Awake to the wrath

Harry Potter Renames His Horse

The guy that play's Harry Potter, whatever his name is, changed his horse's name so Americans would feel more comfortable when he strokes his horse on stage, every night in front of stunned children. Next stop for Harry P, TJ!

George the giant lobster liberated

Yes! A giant lobster is freed from the watery prison at City Crab and Seafood restaurant in Manhattan. An old time lobster named George is taken from a tank located in Manhattan and released in the stormy waters of Maine. Some claimed George the Lobster was 140 years old but local scientist were lead to believe the claim was false, they netted, recaptured and sliced open the lobster to harvest his organs and to prove this fact to be false.

"This crusty old bastard is only 83"

Tasty but only 83.

ARTICLE

SARAH PALIN'S DAUGHTER GETS A BABY GIFT FROM PETA

PETA proves they write wonderful music but Roseanne Barr is their lead singer.

PETA and all their wacky tactics still pale in comparison to Ted Turner's Remark.

"WE'RE ALL GONNA EAT EACH OTHER FOR SNACKS"

ARTICLE

Top 10 causes of dog poisoning

"Hello Pet 9-11 my dog ate my pills!"

The ASPCA's Animal Poison Control Center logged more than 140,000 cases of dogs, cats, and other pets exposed to toxic substances in 2008. The most common call -- accounting for almost one-third of those placed to the center's 24-hour hot line -- involved human medications.

ARTICLE

I TOLD YOU SHE WAS ONE CRAZY McBITCH

McDonald's worker charged with murder while working.


ARTICLE

Sam Shepard busted for having monkey meat.

Sam Shepard was busted for drinking and speeding, he didn't have monkey meat but a lady mentioned in the same article did. Sam also has been living with Jessica Lang forever and the scientific fact that she grew old contributed to his drinking. Mamie Manneh lost her appeal to have monkey meat for breakfast.
ARTICLE

Zoo Keeper Builds Giant Fake Vagina for Lonely Walrus

Holley Muraco has a very unique job, one that would get her an odd look at speed dating and cause many awkward moments in some social settings.

"So what do you do?"

"Where do you find the material for a project like that?"

"In essence you're the Larry Flint of the underwater mammalian adult industry?"

"What kind of ROI do you get on one of those?"

Holley has constructed similar body parts for horses, cows and pigs but it sounds like this the first walrus parts she has made. If this gig doesn't work I know there is a certain hedge hog that would let her construct a body part for her.

ARTICLE

Happy New Year: TOP LISTS OF 2008

Whateverdrugscarsalesmendo [WDCSD] loves a good list almost as much as we hate serial killing clowns.

Some predictions from Contentinople on what may happen with Digital Hollywood and how some of the revenue streams will work.

Contentinople's top 10 predictions for what's to come in 2009.

WDCSD has compiled the top lists of 2008 with the Maxium contributing the most lists as we all know Maxium is a list generating son-of-a-bitch.

1. 5 Women We're not supposed to want (but do)

2. 10 best UFC fights of 2008

3. Just The Best Tech List of 2008

4. The Best and Worst Ads of 2008

5. Top 10 National Books of 2008

6. Sexiest Man Alive

7. AFI 100: Saluting Our Fattest Actors

8. Darwin Awards 2008

9. Top young dork pictures of 2008

10. Bloggers Choice Awards

Obama uses video for reason why we don't need guns

Obama loves this one!

Man protects business with pressure washer.

There really is no need for the 2nd amendment when we have pressure washing vigilantes.

Does anyone hear Death Wish VII???