Rip Salsa thinks not. If the Snarky Agencyspy website is correct and another layoff wave is headed towards the CP+B offices you have to wonder what the absence of Alex has done to the brander of brands. Once high on Acid and some really cheap gin I sat in on a Q&A with Alex in San Diego and I have to say the guy was a dynamic personality and he had an effect on others around him to be creative. Was the writing on the wall? You saw an Noah-like flood of talent leaving even before the Alex left (See Evan Fry and his cool little start up) and current talent just doesn't have that "It" quality to keep the cool going at the high octane speed needed. Can you say Polaroid?
WDCSD isn't just about snarkiness thrust upon certain d-bags, we have love for goodness and forward thinking people and businesses.
Lionsgate® films had a good idea with it's Microbudget films which awards budding actors and filmmakers with a chance to shine like Seth Godin's head. The first couple of films will be RAPTUREPALOOZA a post-apocalyptic comendy, GAY DUDE, a coming of age comedy with a twist, and 6 MIRANDA DRIVE, a supernatural thriller. Joe Drake, President of the Motion Picture Group at Lionsgate announced. So lick my snarky balls you haters.
I don’t think I’ll ever know what drugs car salesmen do, but I’m pretty sure some of them smoke menthol cigarettes. And for those of you that are Kool and smoke Newport cigs you better start hoarding your ciggy’s because that’s exactly what your outdoor smoking buddies are doing.
Although smoking menthol cigs doesn’t fuck you up any more than smoking regular cigarettes the FDA still wants to ban them. Why? Because they say that banning menthol cigarettes is good for public health. Hmm, what about banning all cigarettes? Then banning chewing tobacco. Then alcohol. Then sugar. Then television. Then Adam Sandler movies. Yeah, that makes sense.
Of course Alex Bogusky will happily support banning everything… except fast food. Oh, above is a photo of Alex channeling his inner John Denver. One thing you should know, Alex, John Denver was a hard working, talented musician who will always be remembered. Alex will be remembered as a hypocritical douchebag. Or a sociopath.
Sweet Justice Ryan Kutscher was promoted to Creative Director at CP+B. Staff Members are stoked, as Ryan seems to pull off the trying to be cool side of things so well. From sun glasses at a shoot to the ever popular 'haven't shaved look' and finally posting every award possible for 'Whopper Freakout' on his own web page. (Found nowhere on his award list is the WDCSD's D-Bag of the year award.) Although far less the redoubtable foe of unhipness compared to Alex Bogusky, Ryan has been made and is an earner for the Crispin Nostra Good Job Ryan!
There has been a lot of hype surrounding Alex and his band of cool lately, a "Summer Surprise", a huge push of self promotion and others claiming a near JUMP THE SHARK of Alex.
The business built around watching the ad world has been all over a blow job sandwich which Gawker came out and blamed Cool Alex and the Bike Commuters for and now the Microsoft Puke ad for Explore 8.0, both the work of others and not CP+B but became about CP+B. The continued self promotion has confused some or maybe like a cushion fart that lingers, CP+B still gets the blame for the smell. Fernado from SNL said,
"It's not how feel, it's how you look."
Nice job boys and girls of Boulder...You have made it! Perception is everything.
WDCSD always find it funny how all the nerds come out of the woodwork to make fun of the Burger King/Crispin relationshipafter some news that seems to prove thenerds are winning. Google search Burger King Crispin Porter and BoguskySweet Jesus you would think Obama won some sort of election, Saltine Crackers changed it shape to oval...Mister Salty thinks these pundits of shame are a bit on the salty side. Nerds are still Nerds and CP+B is still CP+B is winning all the time. Maybe once in a while the cool guys in Boguskyland walk out of the bathroom with a urine stain visible on their cool jeans, the pair they wear to business meetings.Alway remember that the urine will dry and they still have the coolest jeans in the business.
Alex's band of Cool heads to Europe after buying the digital agency Daddy.
This makes total sense as Boulder loses it cool factor, Alex can offer an even hipper place to co-workers who take a love it or leave it attitude about America.
Targeting the 30 year old crowd who enjoys the sponge bob kid's meal?
Droves of Shirtless Dad's singing this song as they reward their new girlfriend's kid with a cheeseburger and fries with the promise of not coming into the bedroom later that evening.
After five years of milking the Subservient Chicken and getting used to the creepy headed BK guy and that dude that used to go by HOOTIE now singing country music for real. The luster of the cute chicken is lessened. Hell PETA can't even get any run off the King anymore. I don't blame Rob for turning his back on BK money for the Golden Ticket of MS, Rip Salsa would too. Rip needs a golden ticket to pay off the Los Angeles water bill for my new office water fountain.
What happens when a Moron tries to sit at the CP+B 'Cool Table'? You always look foolish.
What happens when you try to smack CP+B in your article? You always look foolish.
What happens when you call yourself G Man Marketing? You always look foolish.
What happens if you get arrested from drinking 40's while driving a school bus? You look like Rip.
Rip Salsa never tries to explain logically why I think some things are lame and others things are cool. If your a fan of Football you may think every single person knows who the tight end of the Redskin's is. Ask your mom who the tight end is for the Redskins she may say John Elway.
Geeks who try to bash CP+B for using Mac Computers to make the Microsoft ads are just geeks and forget that Mom's don't care, Mom's will just think Lauren is cute. Who cares if Mac still gets the 'Hard Core', my computer will help me get laid crowd. Rip Salsa has a Mac for that reason too and so does his Mom. Rip Salsa also has two refrigerators, one with meat in it and one with no meat, so I can get laid by some hot vegetarians.
Looking through my 11,000 Google Alerts I spotted an article about Microsoft that someone named SCOTT G? What are you a rapper from the 90's? Anyway he tries to bash CP+B for not knowing anything and what happened to advertising and he just screams....
"You Kids Get Off My Lawn."
Rip Salsa hasn't slept, coming off a Vitamin K binge and ended up taking a 11 PM train to San Juan Capistrano only to lose money betting the Duck Fighting last night. Riding the Greyhound bus back to Los Feliz Blvd sucks, thank God for my wireless card.
I asked the Bum sitting next to me if he knew who the Tight End for the Redskins is?
I like Lauren. I like the Whopper Virgins voice over guy too.
Turns out she is an actress and she could most likely afford the Mac but it proves the point that Microsoft, even with it's iron balls isn't going to let Mac just keep kicking them in the nuts.
Good job CD of the Microsoft account who ever you are.
Front man Alex Bogusky and his apostles of bicycling have gathered in Denver to release the word of sharing a bike with others.
First apostle Dave Kingsberry is the leading proponent of the share bike program along with Trek Bikes and the health care company Humanarallied to a common cause and have put together a bike share program that will give NFL players more people to hit in the off season while commuting from the bar to the strip club.
Sounds like a neat program when all the bikes are shiny and new. It will work like someone buying soda pop with their food stamps. How do people treat the bikes in other places that have had bike share programs?
A British man and his wife are suing Alex Bogusky and Burger King for their hair-brained idea of making meat scented cologne.A man and his wife were attacked by a black bear on a recent camping trip to OntarioCanada.Within minutes of spraying himself with FLAME ™ by BK® a black bear wandered into the campsite of Mr. & Mrs. Howard Frord and attacked the unsuspecting campers.Black bears are usually docile creatures that fear man and up to this point had never attacked any humans in the Canadian Park. Mr. Howard Frord thinks something triggered the black bear to awake from deep hibernation, dig through several feet of snow and attack defenseless humans.The Frord’s lawyer James H. Hopiltlity claim that it was the FLAME ™ by BK®, a meat scented cologne marketed by BK and promoted by Crispin Porter & Bogusky’s [CP+B] brain child Alex Bogusky, who runs the creative department and claims all good ideas CP+B has ever created. The meat scented spray cologne was being worn by Mr. Howard Frord for the first time.Mrs. Frord was attacked and severely mauled by the bear and sustained permanent physical damage.Mr. Frord lost several fingers and no longer has feeling in one of his arms from the attack.Mr. Frord in a trembling voice stated, “I will never be able to compete in an American style demolition derby.”
During a recent interview James H. Hopiltlity stated, “The attack has left both Mr. and Mrs. Howard Frord with physical and mental scars that will never go away”.Continuing James H. Hopiltlity recalls a story Mrs. Frord told the lawyer, “I wake up in a cold sweat with the image of a giant fiberglass head of the Burger King with a bear-like body attacking me.” "My clients are asking for 3.7 million dollars in compensation for the pain and suffering inflicted by these attacks."Mr. Hopiltlity also names Crispin Porter & Bogusky in the suit, “There are no warnings anywhere on the advertising that states there will be the potential for animal attacks.”“This travesty is far worse than spilling hot coffee on your crotch.”
The web page promoting the FLAME ™ by BK® has no visible warnings and only endorses the product. Under the About section of the web advertising you find “The Whopper Sandwich is America’s favorite burger. FLAME ™ by BK® captures the essence of that love and gives it to you.Behold the scent of seduction with a hint of flame broiled meat.”
Nowhere does it say WARNING BEARS WILL ATTACK YOU.
It just puts you in a different class of wacko owning weird animals like snakes, rats, tigers, cougars, gators or monkeys. We love the shirtless, the meat grinder accidents, the fact Pam Anderson wont rot after she dies, Alex Bogusky being Alex Bogusky but we do find wild animals living in apartments as lame beyond all other lame items reported.
Former Baywatch star is writing a biography of her dating life and has hired Alex Bogusky to help her write it. Pamala Anderson has led a life under the microscope of Hollywood and always finds a way to stay in the lime light of stardom with little or no talent other than her constructed looks. The Barbie -like star met Alex Bogusky at a Red Robin in Portland Oregon and struck up a conversation about current projects and it turned out they had very simular ideas for a book.
No it isn't the new cologne idea from Alex Bogusky or Ryan Kutscher "just throwing some ideas" out to the Coen Brothers, this actually was a disease. A neurological disorder linked to their inhalation of aerosolized pig brains, 24 pork plant workers have regained their health. If it was Rip Salsa it would read former pork plant worker because aerosolized pig brains sounds like something out of a James Wan movie and not something WDCSD staffers should have to read about in the general news. Also the article mentioned a scientist named DYCK and that's funny to some. I really love meat and haven't really considered going vegan, not because I think being vegan is stupid or abnormal, only because as a child I saw an older vegan lady with a really hairy bush. When you see something like a giant hairy vegan bush it sticks with you for life! But when I hear "Play Misty for Me" it's ruined.
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